sunny side up
Wednesday, January 23, 2008 @ 12:15 AM
...something mortifying happened yesterday and then my dignity fell asunder. I don't know how to describe it without sucking in composing breaths over each little pieces of mortified me. but I shall try. I shall just jump right in. it's terrible the way i've been feeling about things lately, how terribly these OCD inclinations/agitations/evasions seem to be over the most trivial/GORMY matters... they appear mortifyingly funny. like a biuge mortified joke. but life is hardly a joke. it's 'grim', 'full of mortis' but hardly a joke. even when I can pun on rigor mortis. It would describe absolutely what I'm feeling right now. dead stiff. because we don't take jokes seriously and life is to be taken seriously. I really mean this, not trying to be daft, esp about life. I pray to be serious about the right things that calls for propriety and sensibilities- It's no wonder they get all gorm-y (i.e silly in the head when they don't take life seriously. alcoholics and druggies writing in stupor while they're on their way to die in the most mortified and confused manners). Perhaps then we ought to divide life into pieces bite sized cheese cake strawberry maybe it's hayberry or some sort of giddy berries that give those dizzying effects. told to chew nice and slow don't choke on the little pieces of swirly berry bits. then the sensations sorta spreads and burst on your tonguebuds. like those OCD impulses. like impulses externally segmented, targeted and positioned. MORTIFYING I SAY. mortify a child in the school yard. the mortified self realizes it's just part of life. get serious about it. get seriously mortified and let it go. don't make it into a senseless discourse about cake. it doesn't go round in dizzy circles like pretty swirls on the cheese colored berry blue cake nor is it like this paragraph that continues into the beginning which starts and ends into...
Rainbows are made of sunlight and rain -Elisabeth Elliot
hey girl, hope everything's alright. if need a listening ear, can always msn/email me yeah! :)
will keep you in prayers..
hi rachel :) i'm good thanks alot for the concern. appreciate it much. it's some silly thing that got me to think abit. and just trying alittle nonsensical postmodern writing. yeh I'll email you sometime :D
POSTMODERN. gosh i so hate that word. RMIT made us study it. disgusting.
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